Cheaply departed

Dying is the last thing we’re all going to do on this earth, and for many of us, it’ll be one of the most expensive things, too.

In 2004, the average price of a funeral was $6,500, not including cemetery costs, according to the National Funeral Directors Association. Add a scenic plot and nice stone, and suddenly the middle-of-the road price for planting someone is close to 10 grand. You didn’t throw money away when you were alive (not counting that Browns PSL), so it’s a good bet you don’t want your family to throw thousands down that 6-foot hole when you die.

Did you know that your family can make a casket, have a viewing at home, even act as the funeral director and transport your body to the cemetery or crematory in the minivan?

Don’t laugh. Turning your goodbye into a good buy makes more than financial sense.

Experts know that being involved in the planning and execution (wait, wrong word) of a loved one’s funeral can help with the grieving process. Here are some ways your family can mourn over you — and not the bill.

Call around

Your family probably wouldn’t buy a television without checking a few prices, why bury you without kicking the tires of a few funeral homes?

When asked, funeral homes are required by law to give you their itemized general price list, or GPL. Go to a few places and compare. You’ll be surprised how much prices differ.

The casket

Your loved ones don’t have to buy your casket at the funeral home, where coffins can cost more than cars and where markups, according to the watchdog Funeral Consumers Alliance, are often many times wholesale.

“The most commonly sold lowend casket is the cloth-covered, particle-board, crepe-lined casket.

The wholesale cost for that is about $150,” says Lisa Carlson, executive director of the nonprofit Funeral Ethics Organization.

“I see those regularly [at funeral homes] at $895, $795, $695.”

Plan to be buried in a homemade casket (kits and hardware are available online). Even someone with limited woodworking skills can make a simple pine box.

Otherwise, remember that retail casket stores, Web sites, even Costco now sell coffi ns. Funeral directors are required by law to accept your box — homemade or store-bought — and not charge a handling fee.

Burial

Space in city, county and church cemeteries is usually more affordable than plots in “for-profit” cemeteries, says Carlson.

Veterans and their spouses are entitled to free plots, burials and memorial stones in veterans cemeteries.

If you’re in a rural area, the cheapest option might be a burial on your property. Ohio law leaves it up to municipalities to regulate burial, so have your family check laws before they grab a shovel.

Embalming

Many folks still believe there are health reasons behind embalming, says Carlson. There aren’t.

It’s not required by law, but funeral homes often require it for open-casket viewings. Consider keeping the lid closed and forgoing embalming.

“Most people don’t go to a viewing to peek at a dead body,” says Carlson. “They are there to show support for the family.”

Remember there’s no rush to call the funeral home. If you die at home, have your family and friends pay respects there.

Cremation

In 1975, about 6 percent of our dearly departed were cremated. It’s up to about 30 percent now and expected to climb to 43 percent by 2025, according to statistics and projections by the Cremation Association of North America.

If you are OK with going up in smoke, it presents a great costcutting choice.

First off, make sure your family uses an inexpensive cremation container, in other words, a cardboard box, for about $30 to $75. Expensive urns are not necessary.

Have your ashes (they’re actually more like aquarium gravel) spread or stored anywhere you want.

“You’re limited only by your imagination,” says Carlson. “One lady put her grandmother in a cookie jar.”

Go with a memorial service

Request a simple burial, simple cremation or body donation, then urge your family to hold a memorial service (it could be weeks later) — not at the expensive funeral home, but at a church, park, art gallery or even your back yard.

Make it a celebration of your life. If you want, have your loved ones take the money they saved and have a — blowout — in your honor.

Your family, funeral directors

Until about 150 years ago, families washed, dressed and laid out their loved ones. Viewings were at home (there is a reason the living room used to be called the parlor). And burial was often right on the family’s property.

Believe it or not, it can still be done. Ohio law doesn’t require a professional funeral director be hired. Your family, if they’re up to it, can certainly do it.

A do-it-yourself funeral can be incredibly moving, beautiful and therapeutic, but your family probably won’t want to wing it, so educate yourselves now.

Visit FinalPassages.org or Crossings.net and read how other folks have done it.

“I’ve never had anyone regret having a home funeral,” says Carlson. “It’s easier than a 1040-EZ.”

The totally free option

Face it, you always wanted to go to medical school, right?

Here’s your chance.

Donate your body to science; Case Western Reserve University School of Medicine is closest.

Your legacy will be the education of future medical professionals — and it’s totally free!

Simply have a loved one call the school at the time of death. Case will drive over and pick you up (it’s free within 75 miles). After the school is done with you, your cremated remains will be returned to your family. Call 216-368-3430.

Join the memorial society

The Cleveland Memorial Society is a godsend for minimalists. The nonprofit consumer group has negotiated low prices for simple burial ($665) and cremation ($525).

There’s a one-time $15 membership fee. For more info, go to www.clevememorialsociety.org.

Only one problem: If you’re dead, you can’t join.

More Articles

Home/Caskets/Pre-Need Planning/Veterans & AARP Members/Urns/Guarantee/Site Map/Legal Rights/Recommendations/FAQ/Books/ Terms & Conditions / Contact Us

Copyright 1999-2007 National Casket Gallery. All Rights Reserved.